Friday, June 15, 2012

Facebook Depression/Issues - Incel Support



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Old Yesterday, 06:57 PM ? #1

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rossc09 is offline

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Location: Boston, MA

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Facebook Depression/Issues


I don't know if anyone else on here is a real FB user, but I am.
I find that I experience periods of time where I'm really lonely and I might go for a long time waiting for contact online, and I start to get depressed instead.

Sometimes I won't stop myself and I'll write stuff that comes off as bitter or awkward, when it's really just because I'm feeling down.

I find myself blatantly ignoring or deleting posts about ppl in relationships/engagements, etc., because it all makes me feel desperate and down on myself.

What do you guys do when/of you experience this?

(I won't be deleting my FB account)

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Old Yesterday, 08:42 PM ? #2

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recniceguy is offline

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I think eventually one gets tired of waiting on online contacts for social interactions and becomes motivated to try something different. You know, a desire to analogue/fleshy interactions and doing stuff. That's what's been going on with me and spending more time trying to break out and open to people, as in a lot more time/effort/investment spent on social stuff.

I even deleted friends who weren't really writing back to me or paying attention or if I questioned if they genuinely were friends. Though to be fair, most of them are adults with families, kids, work, commitments and don't have time for long FB chats as they used to or don't care anymore because they have what they need, as in a spouse or are popular already or are living the dream.

They are probably still nice folks, but, I do have a need for people who will be around to chat with and available and who WANT to chat with me, not "Have to" chat with me. Friendship shouldn't be work. WAAAY too much work in society already.

The problem is, I've been starving myself for social and sexual interactions for YEARS and now that need is large. People my age aren't able to provide that. So it's difficult to re-establish the social groove. But it's like anything that you placed on the back burner which now needs rebuilding.

So yes, it's a lot of work. But I think in the end, it'll be worth it.

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Old Yesterday, 08:53 PM ? #3

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sadtwin is offline

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It being wedding season, dozens and dozens of people on my Facebook have gotten engaged/married of late. And, yeah, it depresses the hell out of me. I just try to ignore their posts and/or not log on much when I'm in a bad mood.

Quote:

Sometimes I won't stop myself and I'll write stuff that comes off as bitter or awkward, when it's really just because I'm feeling down.
I can relate to this, but it really only serves to further isolate you. "She's bitter and awkward. Better not talk to her." I journal a lot when I'm depressed about this kind of stuff - it gets the bad feelings out and down on paper without alienating anyone.
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Old Yesterday, 09:10 PM ? #4

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DamianS is offline

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Location: Toronto Canada

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Quote:

I don't know if anyone else on here is a real FB user, but I am.
I find that I experience periods of time where I'm really lonely and I might go for a long time waiting for contact online, and I start to get depressed instead.

Sometimes I won't stop myself and I'll write stuff that comes off as bitter or awkward, when it's really just because I'm feeling down.

I find myself blatantly ignoring or deleting posts about ppl in relationships/engagements, etc., because it all makes me feel desperate and down on myself.

What do you guys do when/of you experience this?

(I won't be deleting my FB account)

I can't think of any benefit to publically posting depressive stuff. I mean, I've done it on Facebook too but NOONE CARES.

Take sad's advice. Write it down for you and never show it to anyone but maybe a therapist.

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Old Yesterday, 09:12 PM ? #5

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rossc09 is offline

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Yeah, I think I might want to start journaling.
Part of the reason I came back here is that I needed to get this stuff of my chest without putting in on FB.

And it *is* wedding season. Feels like it's what EVERYBODY's doing right now. I just take that stuff off my feed right away.

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Homey don't play dat'

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Old Yesterday, 09:18 PM ? #6

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The Sound of a Train is offline

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Location: Knoxville

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Quote:

And it *is* wedding season. Feels like it's what EVERYBODY's doing right now. I just take that stuff off my feed right away.

Y'all are right about that. In fact, I'm "man of honor" for my best friend in her wedding here soon. I'm happy as hell for my friends getting hitched, though! It makes me wist about being in a loving relationship. Maybe I'll meet some other lonely singles at the wedding
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Old Yesterday, 10:03 PM ? #7

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sadtwin is offline

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This is a great attitude! Good for you!
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Old Today, 12:28 AM ? #8

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neverhadaboyfriend is offline

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Part of my job is managing business facebook pages, so I am on the damn site all day. It is evil and if I ever change jobs I will delete my account. I get so depressed and jealous whenever I am on there. All I see are people getting married, traveling with their partners, having kids, flashing engagement rings and it brings out feelings in me that I do not want to deal with. I am happiest whenever I am not on there and just living my life outside of social media.

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Old Today, 12:29 AM ? #9

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neverhadaboyfriend is offline

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This is a great attitude! Good for you!

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Old Today, 05:24 AM ? #10

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Ikari is online now

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I also have a wedding coming up next month, it truly is wedding season...

Anyway, about the writing bitter/awkward stuff on facebook, I would definitely try to avoid that at all costs. Most people use facebook to chat with friends, share good news, funny videos, songs they like... light stuff. When someone has a meltdown on there it's usually only a source for gossip and the person is left even more alienated. Like sadtwin said, a journal could help. If you need feedback you can either post here or maybe get an anonymous blog?

If it's too much to handle you could try going a few days without logging in.

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Here is my secret. It is very simple: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
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